Grief that has not been fully processed does not simply dissipate. It converts. For many adults, particularly men, the conversion pathway leads to anger because anger is more tolerable than sadness. A man who lost a parent, went through a divorce, experienced a professional failure, or suffered any significant loss may find that the grief never fully arrived. What arrived instead was rage, a rage that attaches itself to whatever is immediately available: a partner's comment, a billing error, a slow driver. The connection between the loss and the anger is invisible to the person experiencing it, but it is operating continuously in the background.
Dr. David Steinbok works with adults in Boca Raton, Florida who are carrying anger that may be rooted in unprocessed grief. His psychodynamic approach creates a therapeutic space where the grief can be accessed and felt directly, which is what allows the anger to release. A therapist who understands why someone is angry all the time recognizes that the anger may be grief in disguise, and treats accordingly.
