Loneliness caused by a lack of social contact is painful, but it has a straightforward solution: increase social contact. The loneliness of feeling disconnected from everyone even when surrounded by people is a different problem entirely. It does not respond to more invitations, more plans, or more time spent with others. The person can add relationships and still feel alone because the issue is not the absence of people. It is the absence of felt connection. The relationships exist, but the person cannot access them emotionally. They are going through the motions of connection without experiencing the substance of it.
Dr. David Steinbok helps patients from the Boynton Beach, Florida area understand this distinction and explore why the felt connection is absent. A therapist who treats feeling disconnected from everyone recognizes that the problem is internal and relational in origin, and that the solution is therapeutic work on the barriers to emotional connection rather than behavioral advice about socializing more.
